On being (powerfully) vulnerable
Vulnerability, ah yes...vulnerability. I've heard so many reasons why vulnerability is not a good idea. I've also witnessed a great number of people who think they're being vulnerable...Not so. It's not a kind of sort of way to be. It's an all in, all the time, open, aware, inviting and present way to be.
It's sharing who you are. Something amazing happens when you share yourself. You get who in your life is healthy and present enough to listen. From there, you get to let go of all the things that hurt or where you think you can't, with those people.
And there are many.
They're waiting for someone to speak up.
That's why you're being (powerfully) vulnerable. You're the one who is giving them permission to be human too.
Get vulnerable to all those things you fear. Get vulnerable to owning your space and having pride for who you are. Get vulnerable enough to choose yourself over everything you listen to that you hide your light behind.
Someone else's opinion? Someone else's belief? Someone else's fear?
Right now, writing this, is me being vulnerable to address this.
What does becoming powerfully vulnerable look like?
First, start saying how you are when people ask...for real. "How are you?" "Oh, how am I? Well, I'm working my butt off to make a difference for people. And I'm scared out of my mind. And I'm failing. And I'm willing myself out of bed some days and others I am so inspired and still others I think I might actually be the biggest fake to walk this planet. And I'm working through it, not matter how hard I choose to see it to be at times. Thank you so much for asking..."
That kind of sharing.
Tell people how hard you are on yourself when you're behind closed doors.
Admit You have no idea what you are doing.
To the receptionist at the Doctor's office. To a new friend. To possible business collaborators.
Then closer to home. Your oldest friend. Your boss. Your mother.
You name it.
Is it the best choice for your professional and personal successes at times? Oh no.
Is it good for your sex appeal at times? Oh no.
Do you look good at times? Oh, hell no.
It doesn't matter.
You get good enough at sharing what needs to be heard and supported, you could really be honest and vulnerable with EVERYONE.
YES, Even the person you just thought of that shook you in your bones.
It gets easy.
You just automatically start to do it.
Sometimes tears run down my face while I talk about my day or my dreams or my frustrations. I don't even care. Sometimes people back away...or go away. It's all good. I'm here holding the space for them to be able to be with how uncomfortable they feel about being vulnerable, whenever they're ready.
In my practice of being (powerfully) vulnerable, I got something huge about life. I got impermanence. I got risk. I got LIVING.
The truth is, as human beings, we can't authentically NOT be vulnerable. We aren't getting out of this alive, folks. We all have an expiration date and we are all going to fail and we are all going to lose at games we play. There's actually nothing that will last. Absolutely nothing.
"Nothing gold can stay... Stay gold, Ponyboy" - the Outsiders.
Sorry Ponyboy, not possible.
You never know when time's up. You're vulnerable to your heart stopping, your love leaving, you boss firing you. You're vulnerable to getting lost. You're vulnerable to ruining a "perfect" plan. You're vulnerable to life, whether you choose to truly live it or hide behind yourself. When you put yourself on the firing range you are, very well, vulnerable to being shot.
And you know what? THAT. IS. AWESOME. Do you get that? It's not a reason to quit and ball up or hide. It's actually a reasons to run and jump...and free fall.
Because you're also vulnerable to winning and being seen as the amazing success of a human being you are. You're also vulnerable to being the one. The one that people are waiting for, to be there to show them the way, to open up their eyes to the MAGIC they can make in this life. You're also vulnerable to falling madly in love - the deepest most profound love ever experienced with someone who truly sees you for who you are...and asks you to be that person for them.
And all that can be. If you're not open to being vulnerable, it might be...but you won't experience it deep in your heart.
Being (powerfully) vulnerable is saying no to another you love to preserve that "yes" you say to yourself. It's speaking your truth even though you might not be heard. It's feeling the highest highs, knowing that also means you'll also feel the lowest lows.
And it's worth it Because being (powerfully) vulnerable is being alive.
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